Dang Dang Doko
Dang
Chapter 8. Another
Sunday
Question 1: As a child, sundays have been
something very special to me. Now, since a few days, I wake up every morning
and go out, see the sun shining through the trees, hear the birds singing and get
this feeling, 'Ah, another sunday.' I put on my best clothes and have sunday
for the whole day. What is happening to me?
Don't make a problem out of it.
The mind is constantly
searching for something to pounce upon -
even happiness. It makes a problem out
of happiness also. If you are feeling happy, you ask, 'Why?' That question is
dangerous.
If you are suffering it is good
to ask 'why?' because the suffering has to be dissolved, transcended; ways and
means have to be found to get out of it - so
the 'why?' is relevant.
But when you are happy, then to
ask 'why?' is to disturb it. There is no need to ask any questions. When
happiness surrounds you accept it totally without any questioning.
If you are ill, diagnosis is
needed, analysis is needed, because the disease has to be found.
But if you are healthy you
don't go to the doctor to ask, 'Why am I healthy? Diagnose my health. What is
happening to me?' You don't go.
It is a habit of the mind
because it has been always living in misery, unhappiness, and always the 'why?'
has been relevant. So when clouds disappear for the first time and the sun
shines in your life, the old question goes on persisting - 'Why?' Learn to accept happiness, learn to
enjoy it without any questioning, learn to trust happiness, don't doubt it,
because the very doubt will be a poisoning. Happiness rarely happens. Those
moments are very few and far between. When they come, welcome them, open your
door, receive them with your full heart, don't withhold anything. Even a
question will become a very, very strong wall between you and your happiness.
Every day is a Sunday. It
should be so. Every day is a holiday. It should be so. Because all days belong
to him. Each moment is holy. Once you understand it, you will stop asking
questions like this.
Don't think that any particular
day is needed for you to be happy - only a particular mind. It has nothing to do
with time; everything depends on the attitude, how you look at life. There are
people for whom even a Sunday is not a Sunday. There is no light, no sun rising
- even on a Sunday. They are clouded in their
own darkness, shrouded in their own misery. They carry their hell around them.
Even if you force them into heaven, they will go on carrying their hell. They
will live in their hell. Nobody can force them out of their hell unless they
decide to drop it. It is your decision to be happy or to be unhappy.
I have heard about a Sufi
mystic who was always happy, always and always. Nobody had ever seen him
unhappy. It was as if he did not know that language, as if the only way he knew
how to be was happy.
He became very old and one day
a man asked him, 'Will you please tell me your secret?
How you remain so happy? How
you remain so unperturbed? How each moment you can be so blissful? It is
impossible. It is unbelievable. What is your secret?'
The old man laughed and he
said, 'Long before, I found one simple thing: that each morning, when I opened
my eyes, there are two alternatives to choose for that day - either to be happy or to be unhappy. And I
always chose to be happy. Simple is my secret: each day gives me only two
alternatives to choose - to be happy or to be unhappy.
And I always choose to be
happy, that's all. There is nothing more to it.'
But you will not believe in
this. You will say this old man is deceiving. He must have some other secret.
But I also tell you this is the
secret. All great truths are simple truths, very simple. Try tomorrow morning.
Before you open your eyes have a clear - cut vision of two alternatives: being
in hell or in heaven. Visualise misery on one hand, visualise blissfulness on
another hand. See deeply into both. Don't be in a hurry. Look into both as
deeply as possible and wait - then decide. If you want to be unhappy then
decide, let it be your decision - and then be truly unhappy the whole day. Be
committed to your decision and don't try to escape from it. Whatsoever happens,
you remain miserable. And if you decide to be happy, then stick to it and soon
you will realise that your life is your decision.
You are suffering because you
go on deciding in that way; you are suffering because you go on clinging to
your suffering. You have made a habit out of it. It is just mechanical.
Good, you should feel grateful
that it is happening to you - that every day is becoming a holiday. Holidays
are disappearing from the world. In the legal sense people have more holidays.
Workdays are being reduced all over the world, from six to five, from five to
four, and soon even that will not be so - in
the very highly developed technological societies, one day of the week will do
and for six days people can have holidays. But 'holiday' is disappearing - that
quality of sacredness, that quality of holiness is disappearing.
I have heard about a very
reformed temple. Of course it is in Southern California because everything in
California is a little far - out, even religion.
There is a reformed temple in
Beverley Hills that is so reformed that on the holiest of the days, Yom Kippur,
there is a sign on the door saying: Closed for the Jewish Holidays.
That quality, that
consciousness is disappearing from the world.
People have more leisure - that
is another thing. But what do they do with their leisure?
They create more misery for
themselves or for others. Finding nothing to do, they do harm to themselves or
to others. More accidents happen on the holidays - more
car accidents, more murders, more suicides. And after the holiday people are so
tired that they need a whole week's rest to recuperate, to recover. They do a
thousand and one things on holidays just to keep busy, because not to be busy
is to be with oneself and that has become almost impossible.
To be with oneself and to be
happy with oneself - that dimension is completely lost.
That's what a holiday is, or
should be. One is so full of God, so full of being, that there is no need to do
anything, there is no need to be occupied. Occupation is just an escape. It is
a good way to avoid encountering yourself, encountering life. Holidays are
disappearing.
It is good that every day a
feeling arises in you that this is a holiday. It is. If it was not so before,
then you were missing something. Now it has started happening, don't make it a
question.
I used to know a man who was an
atheist. Once I heard that he had become a theist. I could not believe it. So
when I came across him I asked him, 'How come you decided to become a theist?'
'Well,' he said, 'I used to be
an atheist but I gave it up.'
'Why?' I enquired.
He said, 'No holidays.'
If you are an atheist then
there are no holidays, then there is no God, then there are no Sundays. The
Christian parable says that God created the world in six days and on the
seventh day, Sunday, he rested. That rest was very beautiful, it was out of
great creation.
He was feeling fulfilled. He
had created the whole world and, on the sixth day, he looked and he said,
'Good, very good.' And he rested. He was happy, like a small child who has made
something and looks from every side and says, 'Good. I have done it.' He rested
on the seventh day. That rest - day was a fulfillment - day.
The parable has much
significance. It says that you can have a rest - day only after creation. If
you don't create anything, your life will be restless; you will not be able to
have a holiday. Create something - only then you can rest. Rest is a by - product.
You cannot directly rest - first you have to be so creative, you have to
feel so good about yourself, so happy with yourself, so worthy, that you can
allow rest for yourself, that you can allow a day just for fun.
Ordinarily people can't allow a
day of rest for themselves because they feel so condemnatory about themselves,
they feel so unworthy because they have not done anything worthwhile, that they
have not experienced any fulfillment, nothing has happened, they have not
blossomed. Hence continuous occupation, continuous activity is needed.
Many people go on working and
working and working and one day they die... because their work is not creative.
When is the work creative? The work is creative when you love it, the work is
creative when you feel in tune with it, the work is creative when you enjoy it,
the work is creative when you choose it, when it fits with your being and there
is a great harmony between you and your work.
Once that happens, whatsoever
you do is creative. And when after each creative moment you can relax, that
relaxation is earned. Yes, God earned relaxation for the seventh day.
For six days he worked hard, he
created the whole world; on the seventh day he had earned relaxation, he was
worthy of it. That's the meaning of the parable.
If you are creative only then
can you have holidays, not otherwise. If you want to have holidays become more
and more creative. I am not saying be creative in the eyes of others - that
is irrelevant - just be creative in your own eyes, whatsoever
you do. If you love it then do it, otherwise don't do it - choose some other way. Life is vast. Says
Jesus, 'There are many mansions in my God's house.' There are many dimensions
in life. There is enough opportunity to choose.
If you are not feeling
fulfilled in something that you are doing, then don't do it, because this will
be a sheer wastage and you will not have earned holidays. A man who has lived
according to his being, who has done his own thing, earns death. Then he dies,
but the death is a Sunday; then he dies, but he dies fulfilled. He has no
complaints. He lived the way he wanted to live.
If I am going to die and God
asks me, 'If I send you back, how would you like to live?' I will say, 'The
same. I loved it. I enjoyed it. I would like to live the same way.' Just think
about you. If you die and God asks you, 'If you are sent back to the world what
changes would you like to make in your life?' Will you be able to say that you
would like to live the same way, absolutely the same way? If not, then you are
doing something wrong with your life. Then you are dragging your life, then you
are not living it. Then you are simply killing time - as
they say. Then you are simply wasting your energies, they are simply
dissipated. They will not become an integral force and there is not going to be
any blossoming - your tree is going to remain without any
fruits and flowers. Then how can you be happy and how can you enjoy?
Time as holy opportunity, that
is the meaning of holiday - a holy day, a day which is not profane, a day
which is not ordinary. And once you know how to be creative, each moment
becomes holy.
Whenever you create something
you participate with the creator - you have become a small creator in your own
right. If you write a small poem or you sing a song, maybe nobody likes it,
nobody applauds it, but that is irrelevant. You enjoyed it. Singing, you were
happy, you participated in that moment with God, you helped him to create a
song, you became instrumental. In fact, whatsoever is created is created by him
- you allowed him to create a small song through
you. Then you feel tremendously good, good about yourself.
And that is one of the basic
qualities of a religious man: he always feels good about himself. He is not in
any way guilty, guilt does not exist in him - because he lived life as he wanted to live it;
he loved his life the way it happened; it was the only life he wanted to live.
Then there is no guilt. Remember, a guilty person is not a religious person. A
guilty person is ill, a guilty person is neurotic, a guilty person needs
psychiatric help.
A religious person feels
tremendously good about himself; whatsoever he is doing, he is doing something
intrinsically valuable. This should be insisted upon as much as possible: worth
in life arises only when you do something intrinsically valuable.
There are two types of values
in life. One is intrinsic value. You sing a song - it
has an intrinsic value, it is the means and it is the end also. Or you sing a
song in the marketplace to earn a little money. That money is not intrinsic to
the song, that money is an outside value. And if you are singing your song only
for the money, the activity is no longer holy, it is profane. If you are
singing your song for the happiness that it brings to you... Maybe as a by - product it brings money also,
but that is irrelevant. If it brings, it is good, if it does not bring, that
too is good - but your activity has an inner glow to it, it
is intrinsically valuable in itself. If you are happy that you could sing, you
are happy that you had an opportunity to sing, then every day will become
meditative, holy.
If you are doing the
meditations here correctly, this is going to happen to everybody.
That's my whole effort here: to
help you enjoy each moment as it comes.
As a child, sundays have been something
very special to me. Now, since a few days, I wake up every morning and go out,
see the sun shining through the trees, hear the birds singing and get this
feeling, 'Ah, another sunday.' I put on my best clothes and have sunday for the
whole day. What is happening to me?
Something tremendously
beautiful is happening to you. 'Allow it to happen. Don't help your mind to
create any trouble.
The mind will try because the
mind feels happy only when there is some misery. Mind's happiness is not your
happiness and your happiness is never mind's happiness. Your goals are
different; in fact, diametrically opposite. Mind feels happy only when you are
miserable - then there is something to do, then mind
becomes dominating, then he can dictate: do this, do that. One has to fight
with the misery so one has to take the advice of the mind. When you are happy,
mind is not needed. You can discard it, there is no need for it.
It is just like when the
country is at war the army is needed. Then suddenly you see the army becomes
predominant - everywhere you see soldiers, the military,
moving from here to there, all the trains full of them. When the war disappears
they also by and by disappear, then you don't see them so much, then they are
discarded. Not completely - because our peace is not complete; our so - called
peace is nothing but the gap between two wars. They recede back into their
cantonment areas, into their camps, but they go on parading there, preparing
there for some war that can happen any moment. But they are no longer dominant.
And if a country really attains to peace then the military will have to be
disbanded, it will not be needed.
Or think... You are ill, then suddenly the physician, the
doctor, becomes important in your mind. When you are healthy you forget
completely that doctors exist. When you are ill, then suddenly, passing on the
street, you read doctors' name plates - they become predominant, they become the
figure and the rest of life becomes just a background.
When you are not ill and you
are healthy they are no longer figures. The gestalt changes.
The same is happening with the
mind. If you are miserable, mind is needed to get rid of the misery. If you are
happy, mind is not needed; you can simply throw it, you can put it aside.
Mind feels neglected when you
are happy so it starts creating problems about happiness.
The mind can say, 'Look, don't
be foolish. It is not possible. Every day cannot be a Sunday. Look at the
calendar: this is Monday or Friday, it cannot be Sunday. This is just illusion.
And every moment cannot be a moment of happiness - who
has ever heard that a person can live always in happiness? This is not
possible. You must be getting some wrong notions, some delusions. Or you have
hypnotised yourself. Or something has gone wrong. Beware! This is not humanly
possible!'
Mind thinks that only misery is
possible; it has a great investment in misery.
Remember it. Working here with
me, by and by this moment will come to everybody. It has to come. That's what
we are working for. When it comes, don't listen to the mind.
People come to me. They say,
'We are feeling so happy. How come? We have never felt so happy.' And if I look
at their faces it seems that something has gone wrong. Because they are feeling
happy, it appears to them that something has gone wrong.
I have heard about a great
priest who was teaching his disciples how to give religious sermons.
The priest was instructing his
newly - minted ministers on the importance of facial expression harmonising
with the speech.
'When you speak of heaven, let
your face light up, let it be irradiated with a heavenly gleam, let your eyes
shine with reflected glory. But when you speak of hell - well,
then your ordinary faces will do.'
Misery has settled; it has
almost become your character. To be miserable has become your ordinary
existence. When happiness comes you cannot believe in it, you cannot trust in
it.
This is a very ill state of
affairs, but it is how it is. You will have to learn how to trust happiness,
you will have to learn how to trust joy, you will have to learn how to be
nondoubting when happiness comes - to be vulnerable, open. If you cannot learn
that, happiness may knock at your door and you may not open it.
Watch your patterns and don't
be so identified with them. People go on repeating the old tapes again and
again and again. It is not that happiness has not knocked at your door, it has
knocked many times. And it is not that God has not stretched his hand towards
you, he has been groping for you for millennia. But you have become very clever
and cunning in dodging him.
If the Devil comes and gets
hold of you, you immediately surrender because you say, 'What can I do?' If God
comes to you, you cannot surrender, because in the first place you cannot
believe that God exists. This is really something! There are people who say
there is no God but still they believe in the Devil. It is difficult to believe
in God, it is not so difficult to believe in the Devil. It is easier; in fact,
without the Devil how will you be miserable? Without the Devil, on whom will
you throw your responsibilities? Whom will you find as an excuse? The Devil is
your excuse. You can remain miserable and you can say that the Devil is making
you miserable.
And this Devil goes on changing
his form. It has taken many forms: sometimes it was fate; sometimes it was the
Devil. Now, according to Freudians, it is your unconscious; to Marxists, it is
the social structure. But there is somebody who goes on creating misery for
you.
Nobody is creating misery for
you. You are clinging to it.
But this is very hard to accept
because then your whole image becomes neurotic - and
you carry a very golden image of yourself.
I have heard a very beautiful
anecdote. It is a rare beauty.
Senior citizens Israel and Emma
met at a singles' dance on Miami Beach, and within two weeks they were married.
They felt it was a perfect match, for they were both ninety years old.
On the first night of their
honeymoon, they got into bed and the old man squeezed Emma's hand. She squeezed
back and they fell asleep.
The second night, Israel squeezed
her hand again. Emma squeezed back and they went right to sleep.
On the third night, Israel once
more squeezed his bride's hand. 'Not tonight,' said Emma, 'I've got a
headache!'
People go on repeating old
tapes to the very end.
This is an old tape that is
creating the question, 'What is happening to me?' It is as if something like a
catastrophe, or something like a calamity is happening to you. Nothing is
happening to you, you are coming back home. Nothing is happening to you, you
are dropping nonsense, you are dropping the rotten mind, you are stopping
playing the old tapes.
Question 2: Osho,
I am having a great struggle deep inside me before taking the final step, but last
night, when I slept in orange clothes, I felt myself a different person. What
are you doing?
It is dangerous to take
responsibility for you because one day things are going well, another day they
are going bad. I'm not doing anything!
I have heard about a Sufi
mystic who had a small school and guests used to visit him from far - away
places. One day a prince came to visit him and the Sufi did not have the right
pots, utensils, in which to prepare and offer food to this prince. So he went
to the king and he told him, 'A prince has come to our poor school and we will
need a few pots, golden and silver, from you. We will return them tomorrow
because by tomorrow morning he will be leaving.'
So he took seven pots. The next
day he came with nine pots. The king asked, 'You took only seven, why have you
brought nine pots? These two small pots don't belong to me.'
He said, 'What can I do? Last
night your big pot gave birth to these two twins. These are the twins.'
The king could not believe it,
could not think that it could happen, but greed overtook him. He said, 'What is
wrong in it? This man, by some mistake, has brought these pots, so why not
accept?' He accepted. He said, 'Very good. You are a very honest man.
Otherwise who brings babies? If
pots give babies, people keep the babies.'
After a month the Sufi came
again. He said, 'Again the prince has come and we need more pots because he has
brought a few friends also.' So he took almost twenty pots. But then he never
came for two, three days.
The king called him, 'What
happened? You have not returned.'
He said, 'I am sorry. Ten of
them died.'
Now the king was very mad. He
said, 'Have you gone mad? How can pots die?'
He said, 'Just think of that
other time. If pots can give birth to babies, why can't they die?'
So today it was good, but I am
not going to accept responsibility because tomorrow it will be bad and then you
will come to me and say, 'Osho, what are you doing to me?'
It is you and only you. Don't
throw your responsibilities anywhere.
That night you were a little
good to yourself, you allowed something to happen.
Question 3: I am having a great struggle
deep inside before taking the.final step, but last night, when I slept in
orange clothes, I felt myself a different person. What are you doing?
I am not doing anything at all - it
was just the gesture of wearing orange. The person is not a sannyasin yet; that
is his struggle. He is thinking continuously about whether to take sannyas or
not to take sannyas.
You allowed something. It was
just like a rehearsal: you slept in orange clothes just to see what happens.
The very idea that something was going to happen helped it happen. You relaxed
in orange clothes, the mind was more at ease - at
least you have done something.
A very small gesture but yet
you have done something. At least you decided to sleep in orange.
A person who has been
continuously in conflict, for him even a slight decision gives such a
relaxation that others cannot even imagine it. It will be difficult for others
to see because they sleep in orange every night; they cannot believe that
something could happen just because of orange.
The person who has asked the
question is in deep conflict, struggle, divided. Even this small gesture helped
him to relax. Even this much courage... although it was not much, because he
must have put the light off so nobody could see! It was not much but still
something! He took courage in the darkness of the night to become a sannyasin.
He must have felt good, relaxed.
Whenever you come to any
decision you feel good. And the greater the conflict, the greater the happiness
that will come out of this decision.
But don't bring me in because
it is very dangerous. Don't play that game at all.
Let me tell you one anecdote.
'Rabbi Jacobs, I need fifty
dollars to get out of debt,' sobbed Gottlieb. 'I keep praying to God for help
but he doesn't send it!'
'Don't lose faith,' said the
rabbi. 'Keep praying.'
After Gottlieb left his house,
the rabbi felt sorry for him. 'I don't make much money,' he thought, 'but that
poor man needs it. I'll give him twenty - five dollars out of my own pocket.'
A week later, the rabbi stopped
Gottlieb and said, 'Here, God sent this to you!'
Back in his home, Gottlieb
bowed his head. 'Thank you, Lord!' he said. 'But next time you send money,
don't send it through Rabbi Jacobs - that crook kept half of it.'
So please be direct. Don't
bring me in. Otherwise some day or other you are going to be angry with me.
From the very beginning it is
better to be clear. This man is going to take sannyas some day - he
will have to - so I have to make him completely clear that it
is his decision to take sannyas, it is not my persuasion. It is his decision to
jump into the fire. I will keep myself completely clear - out
of it. Only then does your decision help you to crystallise.
When you take it on your own,
absolutely on your own, you become centred.
Sannyas will make you more
free, not less. Sannyas is not a sort of slavery, it is freedom - freedom from the formalities of the society,
freedom from the oppressive burdens of the others, freedom to be yourself.
Sannyas is an effort to become an individual. My help is available here but it
is only your decision which will change you. Even if YOU take my help, it is
you who takes it. I am like a river flowing - it is
your decision to drink out of me or not. It is absolutely yours, and let it be
so.
It needs much courage to take
all the responsibility on one's shoulders. But that courage is a device.
Feingold, on his deathbed, was
surrounded by his children. 'Don't worry, Papa, we'll have a big funeral,'
declared his eldest son. 'There'll be a hundred limousines, ten cars with
flowers.'
'We don't need all that!'
interrupted Feingold's second son. 'Fifty limos and five cars with flowers is
more than enough!'
'Whatta ya makin' such a big
deal?' said the dying man's youngest son. 'We don't need any flowers. We'll
just have the immediate family! Two cars is enough!'
At that moment, Feingold raised
himself up and said, 'Listen, boys! Just hand me my pants and I'll walk to the
cemetery!'
You have to walk! Don't wait
for one hundred limousines and ten cars full of flowers.
Nothing doing. Get into your
pants and walk!
But be on your own. Only that
way one grows. There is no other way to grow.
The mind always wants to throw
responsibility onto somebody else; the mind always wants to become a slave. The
mind is a slave. It is afraid of freedom, it is afraid of responsibility - hence
so many churches and so many organisations exist in the world, because so many
people are ready to fall in their traps. In fact churches are not responsible,
it is the people's need. Because they need certain types of imprisonments
somebody is going to provide them.
The economists say that in life
there is a subtle law working of supply and demand, demand and supply. You
demand and somebody is bound to come along to supply it.
People demand slaveries for
themselves - hence the existence of Hinduism, Christianity,
Islam, and thousands of others who are ready to make a sheep out of you. They
say, 'Come here. Here is the shepherd' and you become just part of the crowd.
I am not here to make you a
sheep. You have been a sheep for too long already. I am here to make a man out
of you. It is going to be arduous, but you have to start becoming responsible
for your own life. Once you start feeling responsible for your own life you
start growing, because then there is no point in wasting time in postponing, in
waiting.
Nobody is coming to help you.
All waiting is futile, all waiting is sheer wastage.
So if there is a conflict go
deep into it. Decide something. Only through decisions do you become more and
more conscious, only through decisions do you become more and more
crystallised, only through decisions do you become sharp. Otherwise one becomes
dull.
People go on from one guru to
another, from one master to another, from one temple to another - not
because they are great seekers but because they are incapable of decision.
So they go from one to another.
This is their way to avoid commitment.
The same happens in other human
relationships: a man goes from one woman to another, goes on changing. People
think he is a great lover - he is not a lover at all. He is avoiding, he
is trying to avoid any deep involvement because with deep involvement, problems
have to be faced, much pain has to be gone through. So one simply plays safe;
one makes it a point never to go too deeply into somebody. If you go too deep
you may not be able to come back easily. And if you go deeply into somebody,
somebody else will go deeply into you also - it is
always proportionate. If I go very deep in you the only way is to allow you
also to go that deep in me. It is a give and take, it is a sharing. Then one
may get entangled too much, and it will be difficult to escape and the pain may
be much.
So people learn how to play
safe: just let surfaces meet - hit - and - run love affairs. Before you are
caught, run.
This is what is happening in
the modern world. People have become so juvenile, so childish; they are losing
all maturity. Maturity comes only when you are ready to face the pain of your
being; maturity comes only when you are ready to take the challenge. And there
is no greater challenge than love. To live happily with another person is the
greatest challenge in the world. It is very easy to live peacefully alone, it
is very difficult to live peacefully with somebody else, because two worlds
collide, two worlds meet - totally different worlds. How are they
attracted to each other? Because they are totally different, almost opposite,
polar opposites.
It is very difficult to be
peaceful in a relationship, but that is the challenge. If you escape from that,
you escape from maturity. If you go into it with all the pain, and still
continue going into it, then by and by the pain becomes a blessing, the curse
becomes a blessing.
By and by, through the
conflict, the friction, crystallisation arises. Through the struggle you become
more alert, more aware.
The other becomes like a mirror
to you. You can see your ugliness in the other. The other provokes your
unconscious, brings it to the surface. You will have to know all hidden parts
of your being and the easiest way is to be mirrored, reflected, in a
relationship.
Easier, I call it, because
there is no other way - but it is hard. It is hard, arduous, because
you will have to change through it.
And when you come to a Master
an even greater challenge exists before you: you have to decide, and the
decision is for the unknown, and the decision has to be total and absolute,
irreversible. It is not a child's game; it is a point of no return.
So much conflict arises. But
don't go on continuously changing, because this is the way to avoid yourself.
And you will remain soft, you will remain babyish. Maturity will not happen to
you.
I have heard.
After taking off her clothes
for an examination, Mrs. Greenberg sat on the table.
'Lady,' said the doctor, 'I
have to tell you that you are by far the dirtiest, filthiest, most unclean
woman I have ever examined in my life!'
'How d'ya like that!' said Mrs.
Greenberg. 'The doctor I went to yesterday said the same thing!'
'Then why did you come here?'
'I wanted to get another
opinion!' answered Mrs. Greenberg.
People go on collecting
opinions. Be finished. Take courage. You have enough opinions with you already.
Decide.
One thing is certain: the past
which you have lived has not been an enrichment for you, so there is nothing in
deciding for it. The known has nothing to be decided for it, only the unknown.
Only the unknown should have a call for you because that you have not yet
lived; you have not moved in that territory. Move! Something new may happen
there.
Always decide for the unknown,
whatsoever the risk, and you will grow continuously.
But go on deciding for the
known and you move in a circle with the past again and again.
You go on repeating it; you
have become a gramophone record.
And decide. The sooner you can
do so, the better. Postponement is simply stupid.
Tomorrow you will also have to
decide, so why not today? And do you think that tomorrow you will be wiser than
today? Do you think that tomorrow you will be livelier than today? Do you think
that tomorrow you will be younger than today, fresher than today?
Tomorrow you will be older,
your courage will be less; tomorrow you will be more experienced, your
cunningness will be more; tomorrow death will come closer - you
will start wavering and being more afraid. Never postpone for the tomorrow. And
who knows? Tomorrow may come or may not come. If you have to decide you have to
decide right now.
Dr. Vogel, the dentist,
finished his examination on a pretty young patient. 'Miss Baseman,' he said,
'I'm afraid I'm going to have to pull out your wisdom teeth!'
'Oh, my!' exclaimed the girl.
'I'd rather have a baby!'
'Well,' said Dr. Vogel, 'could
you make up your mind so that I can adjust the chair?'
Make up your mind. Don't go on
postponing infinitely.
Question 4: Sometimes it seems
like wherever I go I am facing the wall.
The wall is not outside, the
wall is inside you. So wherever you go, you carry your wall.
When you are alert, you feel
it; when you are not alert, you don't feel it - but
the wall is inside you.
The wall is of your own ego - ego
surrounds you like a wall. It persuades you that by surrounding you in this way
it will protect you. That's the seduction of the ago. It goes on telling you
again and again, 'If I am not there you will be unprotected, you will become
too vulnerable, and there will be too much risk. So let me guard you, let me
surround you.'
Yes, there is a certain
protection in the ego, but the wall becomes your imprisonment also. There is a
certain protection, otherwise nobody would suffer the miseries that ego brings.
There is a certain protection, it protects you against the enemy - but
then it protects you against the friends also.
It is just like when you close
your door and hide behind it because you are afraid of the enemy. Then a friend
comes but the door is closed, he cannot enter. If you are too afraid of the
enemy then the friend also cannot enter into you. And if you open the door for
the friend, there is every risk that the enemy may also enter.
One has to think about it
deeply; it is one of the greatest problems in life. And only a very few courageous
people tackle it rightly, others become cowards and hide and then their whole
life is lost.
Life is risky; death has no
risk. Die, and then there is no problem for you and nobody is going to kill you
because how can anybody kill you when you are already dead? Enter a grave and
be finished. Then there is no illness, then there is no anxiety, then there is
no problem - you are out of all problems.
But if you are alive, then
there are millions of problems. The more alive the person, the more problems
there are. But there is nothing wrong in it because struggling with problems,
fighting with the challenge, is how you grow.
The ego is a subtle wall around
you. It does not allow anybody to enter into you. You feel protected, secure,
but this security is deathlike. It is the security of the plant inside the
seed. The plant is afraid to sprout because - who
knows? The world is so hazardous and the plant will be so soft, so fragile.
Behind the wall of the seed, hiding inside the cell, everything is protected.
Or think of a small child in
the mother's womb. Everything is there -
whatsoever the need of the child it is
fulfilled immediately. There is no anxiety, no fight, no future. The child
simply lives blissfully. Every need is fulfilled by the mother.
But would you like to remain
always in your mother's womb? It is very protective. If it was given to you to
choose, would you choose always to be in the mother's womb? It is very
comfortable, what more comfort is possible? Scientists say that we have not yet
been able to make a situation more comfortable than the womb. The womb seems to
be the last, the ultimate in comfort. In fact, Freud and his followers say that
the desire of moksha is nothing but the desire for the same lost womb of the
mother. So comfortable - no anxiety, no problem, no need to work. Sheer
existence. And everything is supplied automatically - the
need arises and immediately it is supplied. There is not even the trouble of
breathing - the mother breathes for the child. There is no
bother about food - the mother eats for the child.
But would you like to remain in
the mother's womb? It is comfortable but it is not life.
Life is always in the wild.
Life is there outside.
The English word 'ecstasy' is
very, very significant. It means: to stand out. Ecstasy means to get out - out
of all shells and all protections and all egos and all comforts, all death - like walls. To be ecstatic means to get out,
to be free, to be moving, to be a process, to be vulnerable so that winds can
come and pass through you.
We have an expression,
sometimes we say, 'That experience was outstanding.' That exactly is the
meaning of ecstasy: outstanding.
When a seed breaks and the
light hidden behind starts manifesting; when a child is born and leaves the
womb behind, all the comforts and all the conveniences behind, moves into the
unknown world - it is ecstasy. When a bird breaks the egg and
flies into the sky, it is ecstasy.
The ego is the egg and you will
have to come out of it. Be ecstatic! Get out of all protections and shells and
securities. Then you will attain to the wider world, the vast, the infinite.
Only then you live, and you live abundantly.
But fear cripples you. The
child, before he gets out of the womb, must also be hesitating about whether to
get out or not. To be or not to be? It must take one step forward and another
step back. Maybe that's why the mother goes through so much pain. The child is
hesitating, the child is not yet totally ready to be ecstatic. The past pulls
it back, the future calls it forth, and the child is divided.
This is the wall of indecision,
of clinging with the past, of clinging with the ego. And you carry it
everywhere. Sometimes, in rare moments, when you are very alive and alert, you
will be able to see it. Otherwise, although it is a very transparent wall, you
will not be able to see it. One can live his whole life - and
not one life, many - without becoming aware that one is living
inside a cell, closed from everywhere, windowless - what
Leibnitz used to call 'monad'. No doors, no windows, just closed inside - but
it is transparent, a glass wall.
Sometimes it seems that wherever I go I am
facing the wall.
Not facing it exactly, you are
carrying the wall in front of your eyes. When your eyes have a clarity then you
see it; when your eyes are dull and you are unconscious you can't see it.
This ego has to be dropped. One
has to gather courage and shatter it on the floor. People go on feeding it in
millions of ways, not knowing that they feed their own hell.
Mrs. Cochrane was standing
beside the coffin of her dead husband. Their son stood at her elbow. The
mourners, one by one, passed in review.
'He's feeling no pain now,'
said Mrs. Croy. 'What did he die of?'
'Poor fella,' said Mrs.
Cochrane. 'He died of gonorrhoea!'
Another woman gazed at the
corpse. 'He's well out of it now,' she said. 'He's got a smile of serenity on
his face. What did he die from?'
'He died of gonorrhoea!' said
the widow.
Suddenly, the son pulled the
mother aside. 'Mom,' he said, 'that's a terrible thing to say about Pop. He
didn't die of gonorrhoea. He died of diarrhoea!'
'I know that!' said Mrs.
Cochrane. 'But I'd rather have them thinkin' he died like a sport - instead of the shit - he was!'
To the very end they go on
playing games continuously.
The ego does not allow you to
be true, it goes on forcing you to be false. The ego is the lie, but that one
has to decide. It needs great courage because with it will shatter all that you
have been nursing up to now. It will shatter your whole past. With it YOU will
shatter completely. Somebody will be there but you will not be that person. A
discontinuous entity will arise within you - fresh, uncorrupted by the past. Then there
will be no wall; then wherever you will be, you will see the infinite without
any boundaries.
The old man, entering his
favourite bar, found that the usual barmaid had been replaced by a stranger. He
was nonplussed at first, but gallantly told her that she was 'the best - looking girl I've seen in a long time'.
The new barmaid, a haughty
type, tossed her head and replied acidly, 'I'm sorry I can't return the
compliment.'
'Oh well, my dear,' the old man
answered placidly, 'Couldn't you have done as I did?
Couldn't you have told a lie?'
All our formalities are nothing
but helping each other's ego. They ARE lies. You say something to somebody and
he returns the compliment. Neither you nor he is true. We go on playing the
game: etiquette, formalities, the civilised faces and masks.
Then you will have to face the
wall. And by and by, the wall will become so thick that you will not be able to
see anything. The wall goes on getting more and more thick every day - so
don't wait. If you have come to feel that you are carrying a wall around you,
drop it! Jump out of it! It takes only a decision to jump out of it, nothing
else. Then from tomorrow don't feed it. Then whenever you see that you are
again nursing it, stop. Within a few days you will see it has died, because it
needs your constant support, it needs breastfeeding.
Question 5: When the other bank is this
very bank, then there is no need for enlightenment. If one is alive in this
moment, then why should one dream of enlightenment?
These questions with 'then' and
'if' are very cunning questions. And you are not deceiving anybody else, you
are deceiving yourself. Listen to the question again.
When the other bank is this very bank, then
there is no need for enlightenment.
If you have come to know that
the other bank is this very bank then you have already become enlightened,
there is no need. This is what enlightenment is all about. If you have come to
know that this moment is all and the place that you are in is the whole, and
that this world is the other world - you have attained, you are liberated. Because
if there is no other world there can be no desire. If this moment is all, all
desire ceases.
When the other bank is this very bank, then
there is no need for enlightenment.
Absolutely true.
If one is alive in this moment, then why
should one dream of enlightenment?
There is no need.
But these questions won't help.
It has not happened to you. This bank is not yet the other bank and this moment
is not yet the eternity.
You have listened to me and you
have become parrot - like. I say that there is no need for any enlightenment,
the very search for enlightenment is nightmarish - but
that is not going to help. You will have to drop all searching, then you will be
able to realise the fact that you are already enlightened.
There is nowhere to go, you are
already THERE; you have always been there from the very beginning, there has
been no going astray. We have lived in God, we have lived as Gods, there is no
other way.
If you have understood this
then there is no need for enlightenment, it has already happened. If you have
not understood it - you have simply listened to me and you are
playing with words - then you will be getting into more and more
confusion.
Your desire will not stop by
these 'whens' and 'ifs'; it will continue. Your ambition will not disappear. Be
more practical - don't become theoretical, don't become
metaphysical, don't become philosophical. Be more practical. Listen to your own
state. You have desires, you have desires for tomorrow, you have hopes for a
future, you are continuously hoping that something is going to happen - something great, something extraordinary,
something special. And only to you and to nobody else.
These 'ifs' and 'whens' will
not stop that. If you can drop all hoping, all desiring - what
Zen people call TRISHNA - if you can drop all desire to become somebody
or something, if you can drop becoming, if you understand the foolishness of
hoping and it disappears and you are left without any trace of desire, that's
what enlightenment is.
Then there is no need. But be
practical.
I have heard.
Scientists concluded that the
ice cap was going to melt and the whole world would be flooded within six
months.
When the news broke, religious
leaders went into deep conference. The Protestant hierarchy released a
statement: 'Because of the impending disaster, Protestants will go to church
and pray for two hours every day.'
The Catholics made an
announcement: 'Because of the coming deluge, Catholics will make every other
day, all day, a day of prayer, for the next six months.'
Rabbis from all over the land
convened, then they too issued a message to the world:
'Because the whole world will
be flooded, learn how to live under water.'
Be more practical, be more of a
Jew.
Otherwise my words can mislead
you. I have no intention even to guide you, but my words can misguide you
because you can take them on the surface.
You can say, 'Yes, Osho says
there is no need for enlightenment, so forget all meditation and be the fool
you have always been.' This is not going to change you.
Try to understand each word
that I say to you - . Each word that I utter is pregnant with tremendous
meaning but you will have to decode it.
The rabbi had stood before the
synagogue's board of directors for almost an hour pleading with them to buy a
chandelier for the temple.
When he'd finished, Blum, the
elderly president, stood up. 'What're we wasting time talkin' for?' he
demanded. 'First of all, a chandelier - we ain't got nobody who could even SPELL it!'
'Second, we ain't got nobody
here who could PLAY it!'
'And third, what we need in the
synagogue is more LIGHT!'
That's how things go. That's
what the poor rabbi is saying all the time - a
chandelier is needed.
What I am saying to you is that
you need a deep centering in the herenow so that no desiring of the world distracts
you, no desire of liberation distracts you. You are so deeply herenow that you
ARE simply herenow; your mind is moving nowhere else, your mind is not
wandering anywhere.
In that pure moment, completely
centred and grounded, YOU are enlightened - but
you will have to attain to that moment. And that cannot be attained by great
philosophical talk - you will have to work hard, you will have to
be very practical.
Right now, as you are, you are
completely drunk, drunk with desire.
He had been to a party and had
imbibed a little too freely. Along about four in the morning he was staggering
home. Crossing a bridge he met a policeman. The cop was a friend, and they
leaned over the bridge rail to converse a bit.
'What's that down there in the
water?' the drunk suddenly asked.
'Look again. That's the
moon," said the cop.
He looked again, shook his
head, and then demanded, 'Okay, okay. But how the hell did I get way up here?'
'Because the moon is so far
down, how the hell did I get way up here?'
I go on talking to you knowing
well that you are drunk with a thousand and one desires. I am telling you to
drop these thousand and one desires. And you are ready to drop them... if I can
give you a new desire for them, if I can give you a bigger substitute, if I can
give you one great desire so that all desires can be sacrificed for it. You are
ready to drop your desires but you are ready to drop them only for a greater
desire. That I cannot do - the greater desire will be a greater bondage
to you. Hence Zen people say that enlightenment is a nightmare. Hence Zen
people say don't try to become a Buddha otherwise you will fall into the
seventh hell. Don't try to reach to the ultimate reality because your very
desire to reach it will hinder you. All desiring is a hindrance - the
desire for God and liberation also.
You would like me to give you a
big desire, a desire with capital letters, so big that you can pour your small,
tiny desires into it. But that is not what I am going to do. I want you to drop
all your desires and not to substitute them with anything else. Only then can
you be desireless.
Desireless, you are
enlightened.
Enlightenment is not somewhere
waiting for you, it is already here. It surrounds you right now. It is within
you and without you. It is in every beat of your heart. But YOU are not here - you
are chasing your desires far away, somewhere in the future, on some planets.
You are not to find
enlightenment somewhere else, the only thing that you have to do is to come
back home. Enlightenment is waiting for you there. You simply don't go anywhere
- that's all. The whole effort is negative - don't
go anywhere. Enlightenment is not a journey, it is your deepest core of being.
It is like you sleep in Poona
and you dream in the night that you are in Philadelphia. And you are in Poona
all the same, whether you dream of Philadelphia or not. You are lying down here
sleeping in your room and in your dream you are in Philadelphia. In the morning
you open your eyes and you say it was all a dream because you find yourself in
Poona, not in Philadelphia.
Those who have awakened have
found themselves in enlightenment. Philadelphia was a dream. This world is a
dream - when you awake, this world disappears and you
find yourself in the other world. This bank is a dream. When you awake,
suddenly you find you have been always on the other bank and you were dreaming
about this bank. Desire is a dream, desire is a dreaming process. It leads you
away, but it leads you away only in the mind not in reality. In reality you are
gods - in minds, it depends. You can make anything
out of your mind.
That's what Hindus say: that it
is mind which makes you a tree, it is mind which makes you a tiger, it is mind
which makes you a cuckoo, it is mind which makes you a man.
When there is no mind, you are
a god. God is your reality and everything else that you see is just dream.
If you understand, there is no
need for any enlightenment. If you don't understand then be alert: listening to
me can be dangerous. You can stop all meditations, you can stop all work and
you can say there is no need. But then you will remain in Philadelphia.